Finding My Pluck!

This week I got to go CAT skiing, a.k.a Snowcat skiing, which is backcountry untracked skiing through trees and powder. So today’s piece  is all about finding the best untracked line,be it in the snow or on the page, and both take PLUCK!

Pummeled and humbled by the mountain and still I rise!

That’s right.  I have no doubt the reason I got the cheers as I skied up to the cat on our last run was because everyone there was just grateful to see that I had survived and was arriving smiling.

Yes – the mountains had humbled and pummeled me but I had completed all ten runs!  I had shown I had pluck! Who knew most didn’t.

Well let’s be clear most didn’t who signed up for a cat ski day at my level of skiing.

I haven’t been skiing that long and frankly have been a touch conservative about where I ski at our Whitefish Mountain Resort.

I have steadily gotten better and this year signed up for the women’s ski program that included weekly lessons.  Now I have made a few black diamond runs and have been feeling pretty good about myself!

So when I got the invite to go ski powder – I took it. I thought I was ready.  Yes, I was scared but I wanted to go.

The thing is if I had thought it all through, I would not have gone.  I would have been rational and realized skiing in powder really meant skiing through trees, very high up in the mountains of Montana.  That skiing where there were no tracks  meant  significant bumps, ledges and (little) cliffs that resulted in taking air!  That once you got out of the Cat and put those skis on there really was no other way down, except to ski and if falling regularly,  to keep getting up again, again and again.   Let me just say here,  though falling in powder is soft – getting up over and over is exhausting.

Rationally it made no sense.  But emotionally – well that is a different story.  My heart wanted to be out in the back-country and loved those moments when I would find some rhythm and even did land a little jump.  I enjoyed learning how to do a  flip through the powder as I was falling so my skis would be in a better position to get back up.  (just to give the full picture – this isn’t an airborne back flip – no this is falling face first towards the snow, throwing both of my skis over my head and sliding ski first so it would be easier to get back up! – nothing graceful about it – but once I did manage to get back up on my skis and continue on down as though I had never fallen!!!)

There were a couple runs that were near perfect through the untracked snow, through the trees and over the bumps.  A couple runs where I did find that perfect line our guide suggested we shot for at the start of each new run. 

I believe I will be a better skier having made this trip. (Yes, I’ll have to get over the stiff and sore muscles – but I will!).  But even if I’m not a better skier, I found my  pluck – having or showing determined courage in the face of difficulties and I’ll take that!

It’s not the first sign of my plucky nature.

Writing has been a bit like powder skiing for me as well.  I struggle with grammer, spelling and find it difficult to stay committed when that great story in my head just doesn’t come out on the page. I have been terrified of feedback (sort of like trees wells and moguls on our mountain!)

Starting my blog took an effort and know I have gone through hearing no feedback from a post , great feedback,  mean feedback – over and over.  I don’t wake with sore muscles but sometimes I wake up dwelling on someone comments.

Still I love to write. My heart sings.  I show my courage, to show up and work to speak from my heart.  It’s especially cool when I find a great story line and ride it through – editing, spell-checking, wrestling with the best way to make a connection.

Yes, be it skiing or writing,  life , or really most any great day, it’s about finding the best untracked line.  Your line and sticking with it.

Bottom-line, that’s life.  We know some day it will end or it’s very possible our heart will be broken over and over along the way  – will we take the risk?  Will we have the spirit and courage to find our best line through – even the rough spots – even when we fall?

Funny thing is, I bet if you asked your own heart – even if it’s been broken many times – the answer would be – yes – I will do it again!

I’m glad I got to ski untracked powder.

I’m glad I write

I’m glad I have opened my heart.

And if I when I have  the chance to to do any of the above again.

I say – YES!

Where’s the powder in your life?  Where have you been invited to open your heart, live full-out,  even when it’s not rational?

Did you say yes??  I encourage you to say yes!

Be Plucky!!

Special thanks to Merrill Lynch, specifically Jamie Carbo and Mike in Whitefish, MT and to Great Northern Powder Guides – you guys are awesome!!

 

 

 

 

Follow Your Heart Day

14542424_1330145196998042_865427924870034475_oValentine’s Day, the day of romance and hearts! Right? Cards, flowers, chocolates and gifts are shared on February 14, either openly or anonymously in the service of romance and following one’s heart.

The first time I even noticed the day I was in an airport in February 1999 and had recently met CrisMarie. I found myself looking at all the cards in the rack. I was smiling and felt the warmth, joy and elation of opening my heart to someone. I was quite thrilled to find just the right card and for the first time write some romantic note that spoke of my feelings.

I had every intention of giving her that card on Valentine’s Day…but it wasn’t until a year later that I found the card I’ d stashed away and finally had the courage to pass it along!

That’s right. I stalled, stumbled and almost walked away from the love of my life because the stories in my head, designed to protect and keep me safe, were controlling the choices of my life!

It’s funny, in my 20’s when I had life-threatening cancer I learned to follow my heart and take a chance, but when I was older and healthy, following the nudges and wisdom of my heart wasn’t so easy or graceful.

I have some pretty strong heart protectors, and frankly, for some pretty good reasons! Those patterns aren’t overcome easily for someone like me! So yes, I stumble, stall, procrastinate on those things that matter to my heart, but I have learned about my tendencies and also how to do it differently.

My Heart and The Horses

In 2011, CrisMarie talked me into taking a Koelle Simpson horse workshop. I was in awe watching Koelle work with the horses. The moment I stepped into the arena myself was life-changing. My heart opened similar to when I met CrisMarie.

There was an invitation to apply to become an Equus coach. Now, I was still terrified of these amazing beings, and had absolutely no background with horses.

Aware of my tendencies, I made note of my resistance and decided to apply anyway, and I got accepted!

Now you might think the path was set, and I would go with grace and ease towards starting an awesome Equus Coaching practice here in Montana, horse country.

No – that’s not what happened!

While in the actual training sessions with Koelle, I was doing great, but back at home I’d procrastinate, stall and not even go and work with the horses. UGH!

Again, having learned about my resistance I have developed strategies to work with my natural tendencies. I turned towards the fear and started using the many pattern-busters I’ve developed of the years. Pretty soon I found just the right ranch close to me and started my practice.

Now I have regular visits with the horses, and I bring my clients and teams out to Stillwater Whisper Ranch. Yes, the dream is happening. Without hiccups and bumps – no – but one thing I have learned is that which makes your heart beat, and even ache, is worth the effort.

So what about you?

I know there are other people like me – who stop themselves: put the Valentine’s Day card in the desk drawer, don’t send their manuscript to the publisher, never apply for that dream job, don’t sign up for the training they long to take.

Because it’s not logical, practical or safe.

That’s why I designed Get Unstuck: Build Your Mojo to help people like you and me!

If you’re like me, you probably have some part of you that protects you for some good reason. But that doesn’t have to keep you from following your heart and inner wisdom.

Build Your Mojo  gives you a proven, step-by-step path to face and work with your resistance.

You will move forward on what matters to you. You will find your way through your procrastination, distraction and avoidance to finally move forward successfully on what matters to your heart!

Sign up for Build Your Mojo  to make this Valentine’s Day a follow your heart day! You’ll get the support you need to make your career, project, relationship dream a reality.

PLUS FOR TWO DAYS ONLY – I’m offering a 50% OFF SALE! That’s right save 50% if you sign up today! It will expire tomorrow so make sure you take advantage now!!

Click here, go to the bottom of the page, hit the button and put in PROMO CODE: valentine2017 to get this special offer!

FINDING THE FIELD BY RIDING THE WAVES

IMG_0621I wish I could say I was busy fighting for what’s right, taking a stand or working towards something that would somehow make a difference in what seems to be our country’s current trajectory.

I read the news and I am upset by what seems like a surreal demonstration of either a dictator in the making or a immature boy trying to puff-up and run the government. What is even odder to me than watching this wild display of immaturity and bullying is seeing others go right along with it – support it – and ignore the very people who our government is designed to represent.

Oddly though I am not compelled to protest, march or actively rage against the unfolding political path.

Why?

I am not sure but something in me just doesn’t think that is a solution that will work. I notice I find much more possibility and encouragement through engaging in diverse groups of people working towards creating a path forward in their community, organization or family.

I find myself listening more and discovering that there is a very deep level of discontent that has now surfaced through this election process and is even louder now that the administration has changed hands.

I have believed for a long time that there isn’t such a thing as righting a wrong done. It’s just not that simple. The very nature of the statement suggest that there is a right or a wrong – a black or a white. This, I think, is the biggest pain point of being human – polarization.

We keep trying to figure it out. To right wrongs or fix the problem. Oddly though that effort just doesn’t make the gap between you and me smaller or any less of a gap. I can not fix what I may have done to you. You can not fix what you may have ever done to me.

I can find peace but oddly that does not come from the outside. It comes from within – when I get beyond my own right/wrong thinking.

I don’t want to sound too Rumi-like here though I love that poem – beyond right and wrong – there is a field – I will meet you there.

I know that field is out there. I also know I live in this very human experience that is you, me and other.

Both things are true – we are one – there is not an other – and yet there is.

The paradox, the pain and yes, the pleasure of that very human dilemma is always present.

So though I don’t know that there are really victims and perpetrators – I do need to own that I am both if indeed there are and not simply try to rise above that agony – but tolerate the pain of being one or the other and both!

That’s really the only path through this current trajectory for me.

I can’t make Trump wrong. Because his very transparent display of child-like narcissism is simply a huge projection of my own narcissistic qualities.

I don’t like what I see and I really would like to rage against what seems like a mad man – but all that I keep hearing is that mad man is me.
Find my own intolerance and work with it.
Be in my world and listen, engage with my neighbor.

When I hear what I judge to be prejudice or bullying – speak up.
Not necessarily to say – “you are wrong”.
But to say – I don’t like that and stand along side with as much compassion and curiosity as I have to offer myself or another – instead of right or wrong.
That journey for me is much harder than fighting a monster on the front page or in a White House.

I know that isn’t the journey for everyone. Some are called to speak out and play on much larger stages.

It will take all kinds to somehow ride this wave.

But I am convinced building a platform of any type of righteousness isn’t going to work. Being ‘right’ isn’t going to get rid of ‘wrong’.
Frankly in my righteousness I believe I may just be making the wave bigger!

It’s time to ride the wave (s) – on a surf board, in boats, maybe a yacht or bigger vessel should you be so inclined or able. But don’t put down an anchor – not yet – stay open – listen and see those riding around you – see the water – not the difference between your boat or mine.

May be we’ll get through this. May be we won’t.

I want to believe we can make and we can do this together – let’s work to get to that field out there beyond right/wrong.

Running Into the New Year!

IMG_3234January is getting off to a fast start!  We kicked off the year with our own week of visioning and planning.  I’ll add our vision boards here because they were fun to create and I think captured each of us, meaning CrisMarie and I, as the unique people we are and our interest together.

We’ve also been into the final edits for our book, The Beauty of Conflict, Harnessing Your Team’s Competive Advantage!  It is exciting and it has been a journey!  We are hoping to launch in March!!

We have a number of team client gigs happening.  We were up in Victoria working with Biocybernaurt.  What an amazing team of folks with quite an awesome offering.  This company works with neurofeedback and assisting people learning to tap their alpha brain waves to work through trauma, problem-solve and take the learning into their lives.   We’ll get a chance to try the technology and I am sure looking forward to seeing the possibilities!!

Soon we’ll be heading to the east coast to work with SkillsUSA.  I love their mission: to empower its members to become world-class workers, leaders and responsible American citizens.  At this point in our country this is really needed and timely!

We’ll also be continuing with Wolfe Mining – we love these guys and grateful to get to keep working with Terri!

There are a number of other opportunities brewing.  CrisMarie is doing more executive coaching in PNW area. Plus we are committed this year to having on-going FREE trainings in the area of Having Difficult Conversations!  As well, I’ll be offering series of Build Your Mojo: Get Unstruck (the first one starts February 21!) and BE Brave is on the schedule and you’ll be hearing more!   There will be two Find Your Mojo in Montana dates!  (the first one in May!!!)

So lots happening with thrive!

I am also excited about being at the Faculty/Assistants Weekend happening starting this friday at The Haven.  I love the energy of having faculty and assistants join together and engage in ideas, connection and ways of continuing to energize The Haven!

So there’s a lot.   Sometimes I can feel a bit overwhelmed and spin in too many directions.

I admit with the book, our different blog post and regular 406 articles, I find keeping up on my personal blog quite challenging.  Also my own writing project can take a backseat to everything else.

It is is hard to keep my focus and ensure I am addressing the right priorities!

What I have learned is that even though I resist structure – structure really does help.  I had planned at one point to have my word for the year be inspirited.  I like that word.  However, I think I will be better served to have my word be Structure!

There are many dreams I have for 2017.  I am also aware that aside from all that is happening in my world – there’s even more challenges/opportunities facing my country, the globe.

I don’t want to just spin around the sun this year.  Yes, I will be journeying around the sun as I have done now for many years.  But I am planning to make this year fun and productive.  I think that calls for some structure and a bit of discipline as I go.

I will keep you posted.  If you want to join CrisMarie and I for a FREE training visit and like our FB page at #THRIVEINCMT.

You may also be wanting to ensure you get unstruck and moving on your dreams  and goals – if so – check out Build Your Mojo!!

Finally, be sure to find your way to The Haven.  There’s tons happening there!  Take a Come Alive, join Carole Ames and I for Living Alive Phase  1 in April, bring you and your partner to a Couples Alive.  These are just a few of the options!

The year is moving and as my good friend, Linda Nicholls said recently it is time to Awake Up and Grow Up!  I wasn’t too fond of the comment at first.  I may have interpreted her statement as a need to be more adult-like.  But I have to agree – it’s time.  Doesn’t mean I have to leave any parts behind – but I do need to take responsibility and not assume it’s anyone else’s job to deal with or make space for what matters to me.

I’d love to hear from you – what’s on you plate for 2017!  If you have a word or plan for 2017, let me know!!

 

It’s Been Too Long & Life Goes On

It’s been a long time!

My last blog came just after the election.  I felt inspired to write and request some space, some time to think and not have to answer questions about how we could possibly elect someone like Trump.

I didn’t think it would be this long.

Life moved on.

I have a business to keep moving forward and a community of friends that remind me that even if Trump has won, we will go forward.

I did find some peace for myself.  Politics is a crazy, impersonal sport that has very little to do with the true hearts of people.  I say this because when I spoke to people I knew that voted for Trump, they were not racist or sexist people.  They were frightened, angry, disheartened about their own circumstances and lives and somehow thought that Trump would do things different.

I may not have agreed with their choice and I get we are here now.  There’s no turning back.  We got Trump.

I admit I lost a little heart when I saw the front page headline of the NYTimes with Obama saying he would have won a third term over Trump.  That just sort of pissed me off!

Really – Obama, can’t you do better than that.  Personally I think that was just a cheap shot on your way out.  Not really like the man I think you are.  I got use to hearing that talk from the likes of Trump – but not you – disappointing!

Anyway it’s time to move on!  We, the people, each have a life to live and people we care about to protect and make sure politics don’t continue to get in the way of talking, connecting, bridging and actually making our country and the world a better place to live  for everyone!!!

img_05772016 is coming to a close and even though this election has made a lot of it challenging there’s much more to a year than what makes the news!

We each have our lives that often don’t have a whole helluva a lot to do with headlines.  Even the people who are making those headlines usually are so much more than what we read about or see on the screen.

Life is NOT lived through media and politics!

So for me, this year has been about finding my Mojo here in Montana. Of course I still visit many other places for work, for connections with family, friends and some strong doses of chi building and heart healing.

However, this year I have wanted to do more right here!  It helps that I found the world’s best horse whisperer, Bobbi Hall and some very special horses.  I love the work I am getting to do with clients, friends, teams and myself out at Stillwater Horse Whisper Ranch!

I love that CrisMarie and I have our book written and will be launching, The Beauty of Conflict – Harnessing Your Teams’ Competitive Advantage, early in 2017!  It’s been a journey writing this book and I am thrilled to get it out into the world.

We’ve also been speaking and connecting more here in the valley.  We are engaged in PowerHouseMT, spoke at AERO and got to meet and write about some awesome couples here in the Flathead doing business together!

I found out there’s a Haven right here in my own hometown.  It’s for writer’s and it’s quite a amazing experience, offered by our local NYTimes bestselling writer and good friend of Bobbi Hall, Laura Munson.  She’s awesome and I believe we’ll be doing some more work together!  It’s amazing when the dots connect!!

The year’s also had some low points.  There have been some friendships ending and programs canceled.  It’s hard letting go of something that you think is going to be solid and yet it’s not.  Sure that’s been hard.

Still I don’t regret, the time spent or the acknowledgement of the need to let go.

It’s provided important lessons, I don’t like to say, “I quit”.  Especially when it comes to people.  But may be sometimes that is just what’s needed for all to be able to move on and build from the lessons learned!

We haven’t had our best financial year and that plays a factor in how we each deal with not meeting our expectations.  Were we successful?  Yes – but revenue/profit does matter and so even with some great learning, fulfilling work and new lines of business – it’s not easy looking at the final numbers.

This year, I traveled back to my hometown.  It’s been thirty plus years since I left.  I went with my mom to take my father’s ashes.  (Now that is a funny story worth writing and sharing but not today!) It wasn’t an easy decision but it was a good one.  I made it and I stayed okay with myself.  Visited the old homestead.  Acknowledged my Dad’s wishes for ashes scattered across Virginia and managed not to get reactive!

I reconnected with a friend from way back.  We shared some stories and some similarities about our journey living with our own versions of ‘crazy’.  I honestly never expected to have that type of connection.  Actually no longer thought I needed it and may be that is just why it was time for it to happen, I didn’t need it.  But it sure felt like something worth having.

I enjoy this time of year.  Reflecting, imagining and celebrating.

So the year is wrapping up and it’s been a good one.  I hope you will be inspired to take some time to reflect and share your year.

It’s a great opportunity to re-member and make space for whatever is due to come next!

Wishing you a wonderful end to 2016 and a great 2017!!

 

Hold Your Fire, Please

My chest aches. I’m not finding much comfort in my furious friends who are ready to fight back. Which is odd because generally I’m the first person to fight for the underdog.

But as I listen to the anger, projected on the people who didn’t vote, the people who did but voted for Trump, I don’t feel good. I feel icky.

When I watch the American flag being burned by people in one of our ally countries – I feel sad.

I want to write my international friends be they in Canada, UK or Mexico and ask that they hold their fire, please.

Yes, we are a country in deep conflict right now. The full extend of the division of our united people is easily seen through the election where Trump won as a self-proclaimed racist, xenophobic, sexist white male by getting the electoral vote. However, Hillary won the majority vote of the people. One a neo-nationalist, Trump and one a neo-liberalist, Hillary.

I like Hillary. Where I may have failed my neighbor is not going below the vicious hate I saw being directed at her. I didn’t like the delivery and so just dismissed it without speaking up.

With Trump, I haven’t been able to get beyond the vile presentation – the bullying, child-like behavior whenever there’s negative feedback and a general lack of respect for the job is being asked to take on, the Presidency of the United States.

As a result, I did not hear the real pain of half of my country.
That’s on me.

I am getting an understanding of it now. There are people who sit in the middle of our country who don’t believe their opinions and views are being heard. They believe government is focused on programs for people other than themselves, and they are being asked to pay for those programs when frankly, they are not making enough money to do it.

There are people who carry guns and use them well and don’t want gun controls that will infringe upon their rights to responsibly bare arms.

There are people who live on the border of Mexico that have had to face and deal with challenges due to illegal immigrants, and worry that if they say anything they’ll be called a racist.

I think white men and yes, some white women, feel threatened by being told they’re privileged. These people are told to shut up, it’s no longer your turn and they just don’t understand the impact of their so-called privilege.

These are just some of the issues I think Trump spoke to and as a result this LARGE group of people felt heard.

Do I agree? Well, that is not the important point.
The real question for me to be asking is, “Did I even listen?” and “Will I listen now?”

We all want to be heard. Often we can live without getting our way if we believe someone has truly heard us and considered our point of view with real interest and regard.

I am not sure I have done that to those people, which is why my heart aches.

Because now I will be living with a President that did listen. I’m not really sure I believe he has good intent for those that he stirred up, but he did listen and did it better than most of us.

So for all my desire for equality and freedom for all – I failed.

I don’t want to keep failing. I also don’t want to see us lose the ground we have gained because we have made progress. I will still speak up to racism. I will speak up to sexism.

But I want you to know, if you don’t realize already, that racism, sexism is within each of us. It’s not relegated to privileged, the rednecks, or Trump.

In my opinion, we’ve got to start really listening to each other and not just fighting back and continuing the cycle of winning and fighting again.

Yes, be angry and find ways to express that anger responsibly and then get back up and relate to each other! Because “We The People” are ALL people – not just the ones who agree with me and even those people who hate me because of who I am. I know that is painful.

I’m not great at listening without defending myself especially when someone is attacking. It is hard to stay open and be curious. However, I can’t just keep saying my own point over and over again. Or run the people I hate out of town.

Frankly, I think the only way to break out of this hell we are now in is to actually try to listen. Not to the press, not to the media but to my neighbor, your neighbor who very well might have voted for Trump.

Working to Live From My Heart Not My Hate & Fear

heartcrackedI am sitting pondering what to say after reading the headlines about where we are as a country.

I don’t want this to be a political post about who you should vote for or why.  Sure I have a opinion and I have voted.  Probably so have many of you.  Plus a lot of my regular readers are Canadian so just watching and wondering – what they hell are we up to!

It seems people around the world are watching and mostly either laughing, crying or fearful that somehow democracy has failed in a country that was founded on the idea and stood strong in defending those noble roots.

Have we lost it?

It would be so easy to just make this mess all about the names on the ticket – Hillary and Trump.  To make the issue about how they are such poor options.

But really?

That is such a cop-out.

Whatever, is surfacing is something each of us is participating in.

I am a believer in using conflict and this situation is putting that belief to a very strong test.

I work with individuals, couples, leaders and teams.  I speak to the importance of being willing to be vulnerable and curious.  Yet, I admit I have struggled to stay open and when people ask me what I am doing to make a difference.  I admit I have many times remained hidden in my opinion because of my fear of rage, retort and the venom that comes back.

So I have to ask myself, what will I do and who will I be on Wednesday if the elections results reflect something I don’t like or fear.

So much of this election has been about fear and hate.  I am not  talking about the candidates,  I am talking about us, the people.  

I’d like to say – not me.

But I can not say that.  I have moments of rage, hate and fear.  I have protected myself from owning my own shadow by projecting it out on people I thought were far worse.  But if I am honest and do the only work I have any control, I most look at my own part in this crazy process.

Maybe I am not standing on some political stage where everything I do is reviewed.  Maybe I don’t have the power to let my own fear and hate change the state of the world.  No, I don’t have control over armies, bombs or people’s right to seek refuge.  No, I don’t have that kind of reach.

But I would be kidding myself if I didn’t know my interactions matter.  I do and can make a difference.  Maybe not on the world stage but how I could I possibly know if that one person I screamed at in hate or recoiled from in fear won’t have the power to self-destruct or destruct a family, a community or country some day.

How could I not know that one kind and honest conversation made someone else do the same.

Don’t get me wrong I am actually not suggesting that making all my interactions positive is the solution.  Because frankly, I think that approach is just as damaging.

I mean show up real, raw, vulnerable.  Owning what I am thinking without just projecting it out without awareness and choice.  That is not an easy task.  But I do think one worth living. I think it is the only real path towards intimacy and connection.  I also believe that to be human does mean we will  make mistakes.  But we can recover if we are willing to look at our own part and not make it something outside of ourselves.

I have spent years working with couples and so often couples arrive in a crisis because of a big event – an affair or some type of event that seems to crack instantly the foundation of trust and possibility.  However, over and over in working with these couples I see that it isn’t the big events that ripped at the foundation but the little things that never got talked or addressed.

I think that is the issue in our country.  Our politics are simply a reflection of not dealing directly and honestly and with each.

This hate didn’t just surface because of Hillary and Trump.  We have been on this trajectory for a long time.

Now we have surfaced the beast inside.  Will we embrace, look at and own it?  Or will we try to kill?

The challenge is not an easy one.  It is one that can only take place in the hearts and minds of each of us as people.  This isn’t just a political problem.

We all have work to do.

Will we?

I want to wake up Wednesday and have my person win.  I admit it.  I think the world will be a better place.

But I do not know that I am right.  It’s my story – a story – not truth.

What I do know is that whatever happens, I want to wake up on Wednesday (actually every morning)  with a renewed commitment to not point the finger outward but to turn 180 and ask myself how will I participate in the interactions where I can have an impact? Will I live from my heart or from my fear and hate.

That my friend is the only thing any of us can do – including Hillary and Trump!

I have faith that all people have that as a choice!

I even have faith in Hillary and Trump.

I have faith in my ability and yours to make a difference one interaction at time.

I really don’t even need to wait until Wednesday, neither do you.

We can change the trajectory now!  Yes, we are cracked – but I don’t believe we are broken!

 

 

 

 

Meet Polly, My Procrastinator

I am not good at finishing!  As a very immediate person, I get myself distracted easily.  The strength of this personality trait some might say is adaptability.  Although I am not so convinced this trait is a strength.  There are too many signs of unfinished failure that haunt designme to think otherwise.  My book, scattered pieces on countless computers.  My closet, always piled with clothes. You might think I never do laundry!

These are just some current day indicators of this ‘strength”.

No, I think there is something else all together at work here.  Myself, I have come to believe, Polly, my procrastinator is the real instigator of my unfinished mastery!

Polly, has been an important protector of me over the years.  Believe or not, her amazing efforts have kept me from humiliation and criticism many times. Her ability to stall, distract and avoid detection has been valuable but may be a bit over done these days.  At other times in my life, writing and sharing my story was dangerous.  My messy, chaotic presentation kept me well under any radar and able to avoid getting too far out into the world where I might create problems for myself.  Yes, there was a time in my life where Polly served me – but not so anymore!

The problem is Polly remains on high alert!

Let me give you a bit of a day to day look at how Polly shows up in my world now.

I decide I want to write this quick post about procrastination.  I start typing and decide it would be good to look up the word procrastinate.  As I am googling the various definitions and diving into the root of the word, I discover a variety of interesting headlines about procrastination.

One,  Two Harvard Professors Reveal One Reason Our Brains Love To Procrastinate (I take a quick look but find it boring).

Two, I find  Later, a New Yorker article about a Nobel-prize winner’s relationship to procrastination (which I find much more engaging of course it starts with a cool story.  Plus, who doesn’t want to be compared to a Nobel Prize winner?!) and finally, a TED Talk by a known pre-crastinator who took on the task of learning to procrastinate because he missed out on a big investment opportunity by quite harshly judging a couple of his students who he wrote off as losers due to their procrastination who in the end made millions.

While Polly has found relevant information thus far, she doesn’t stop there.  Soon I am reading political headlines about our upcoming presidential election, which reminds me that I need to call someone about our upcoming weekend program Find Your Mojo In Montana.  So I get on the phone. Then I realize I’m hungry, and we have nothing for dinner. So I get ready to head out the door to the store and think,  why not take Rosie to the dog park? She needs the exercise.  I better grab a snack before I go. So I wind up making a shake. Needless to say I am soon far, far away from finishing the post and focused in a totally different direction!

Why is Polly protecting and procrastinating this time?!

Polly means well.  She loves the rapid intake of information, with a preference for quick reads and engaging activity.  She loves gathering random bits of information and finding common threads.  She is also very immediate, meaning if she gets bored she’s moves on – thus the inability to read through the Harvard article and get some tips on how to be any different!!

This is not an uncommon course of events for me and Polly!  Sometimes I love the variations and distractions.  But Polly and I have had  to develop a better working relationship.  This day’s activity though demonstrates relationships aren’t about being perfect!

However, I have  worked on this relationship with Polly for a while now.  I have now discovered a path to keep Polly engaged and entertained, while getting things done. (Don’t tell Polly!)

My relational efforts with Polly are the foundation for my new Building Your Mojo program is designed to help people like me develop their own working relationships with parts of themselves that are stopping them from reaching their fullest potential.

See Building Your Mojo Program!  is the outcome of how I have learned to relate and develop a much better working relationship with Polly.  I am putting her various skills into practice so that instead of stalling and never crossing the finish line, I am moving and making progress!

Not everyone has a Polly, but most of us do get stalled along the path to some of our most important goals.  That doesn’t have to happen!  There is a way through!

I ran the beta test last month with a fabulous group of folks and got some great feedback.

I have been on shut down for four years due to several traumas. I was suffering from depression, anxiety and I suspect some PTSD. I participated in Susan’s ‘Build your Mojo and Accomplish Your Dreams’ for a few weeks and found it to be really inspiring and I did actually put my foot back in the water. The whole idea is about living the best life you can and this experience has opened my mind up to possibilities I thought were no longer available. I am currently volunteering and thinking about spending a few months in Mexico. A huge step for me and all due to Susan’s leadership and suggestions.

Jude

I am now launching a new program. Click this link to learn more.

I love the group sessions because these sessions are interactive and engaging.  But I also get that there isn’t always time to dive in and work more individually with someone when things come up. I found people really got value out of having some one-on-one time to help them work through their Polly issues.  So I am offering a coaching package alongside the four week group sessions to give you personalized support. You can find it on the same page.

I love that I’m finding a new job for Polly!  What better way than to use all of her ample skills than to help others transform their procrastination and tap into and build their own Mojo to move through blocks and stalls. She’ll be answering emails, coaching people, and prepping and delivering the live classes, or running the store or checking Facebook.

If you already know you have your own inner Polly to work with – well check out Building Your Mojo on our thrive! site!  Don’t procrastinate – sign up now!

I’d love to play and engage in online learning and relating with you!

 

Find Your Mojo In Montana

You know I love living, laughing and hanging out in Montana!  I also love that I am bringing more of thrive! to Montana.

Our thrive! focus started with our six week Be Brave program. What we’ve heard is that many of you were very attracted to the 3 Day In Person Retreat rather than the six weeks. So we listened.

So we have adjusted and created: Finding Your Mojo in Montana with you in mind. It is for you if you are:14715633_1330130983666130_7704171479520731284_o

  • Procrastinating on what you want most
  • Unable to move forward on an important project
  • Struggling to take action on your heart-centered goal
  • Hesitating because you think you can’t be successful
  • Wanting to hang out with us!

We’ll take you through the steps to see your situation, goal or project in a new light giving you the inspiration and support to move forward. We are incorporating the horses, mi14666096_1330131053666123_5571803453701076254_n1nd-body, creativity, yoga, gourmet food, luxury accommodations and much more. Just get yo14695589_1330131060332789_7915947341387174241_nurself to Whitefish and we’ll take care of the rest.

We wanted this to be intimate so this All-Inclusive 3 Day Retreat in Whitefish is limited to just 8 people.14711621_1330138010332094_8586158324706217639_o14542424_1330145196998042_865427924870034475_o

Dates are: November 11-13th, 2016
It is coming up fast! Hey we are last minute planners!

Good News:

Bring Your Friend Discount

      for you and your friend, making it just $1500 USD

 

 

How To Build Your Mojo and Accomplish Your Dreams

14355106_1447679188581726_6618664619152362553_nI get incredibly excited when I get the opportunity to help someone shift from “I must be doing this wrong,” or “I’m broken,”  to engaged, embodied living!

It’s what I am passionate about – because PEOPLE – YOU ARE NOT BROKEN nor are you doing everything wrong! This is simply a crazy story line that you have somehow gotten stuck believing.

Sure, sometimes the outside results are not indicating the success you imagined, and maybe there are some ways to tip things in the your preferred direction.

Building Your Mojo is for you if you:

  • Keep procrastinating on something that means a lot to you
  • Go forward then stop and give up on your dreams
  • Self-sabotage your success
  • Long for the ability to bring your great ideas to fruition

Let’s be clear, with my clients it’s not about a lack of competence or some fatal flaw that stops them from moving forward and succeeding.

No, most of the time it’s got a more to do with owning and opening to your increasing velocity and using your own brand of genius (or as I call it Mojo) to get to the next level.

Let’s face it – many of us are wary and afraid of abundance, unlimited possibilities, loving and shining brightly, thinking thoughts like —

  • OMG if I shine, I may leave people behind
  • if I succeed, I will fall harder later
  • I’ll become too full of myself
  • I’ll become one of those obnoxious happy, positive people

These are all tapes I have running through my mind. I haven’t gotten rid of them. I know there are some folks that have, but not me.  I have discovered ways, however, of letting the tapes run without losing my larger connection to source, magic and my mojo!

If you struggle with your own version of “I must be doing this wrong!” Or “I’m broken” and you want to try something different – Mojo Coaching might just be for you!

So let’ s talk about what Mojo Coaching has to offer right now!

Right now I am test-driving a new 3 part online Building Your Mojo Group, and I want you to sign up to try this out with me!

What’s in it for you:
• Practical tools you can use to build your Mojo immediately!
• Feedback and support as you take Mojo action in your life!
• Fun learning and relating with me and other Mojo seekers!

This will be a one hour group meeting on October 5, 12 and 19 at 1:30 PM PST

This one will be FREE!!! What have you got to lose?

  • What I am looking for from you:
  • That you can identify an area in your life where you are stalling and know you want to explore how to take action.
  • That you are game for test-driving a new online group process on Zoom. You will need computer access and a willingness to ride the waves of a new medium.
  • A willingness to practice some new tools, meaning homework!
  • You are open and willing to share your experience with others as a way of learning and supporting each other.
  • Plus, you’ll give me straight feedback about what works and what doesn’t for you as we go!

If this is you, email me right now at susan@thriveinc.com. Tell me why you want to try Build Your Mojo. I would love to work with you!  I will let you know if there are open spots.
Let’s do this!

One of My Favorite — Mojo Magic Stories:

My body is a problem

Sally’s initial reason for stepping into Mojo Coaching was around her slower than desired launch of her new service line in her coaching business. I know you are probably wondering what her launch success has to do with her body being a problem.

Well that’s the cool thing about Mojo Coaching. Finding your Mojo to move to a new, uncharted possibility, rarely comes from where you think it will. Most often it comes from tapping into unknown, or exiled parts of yourself, and bringing new breath and life to what has been shutdown or unconsidered.

In looking at her focus area, the launch, it was clear that she had everything in place, yet she was stalling. She had a strong belief that the slow movement was due to her incompetence in one of the business target areas. However, I am a strong believer that often it is important too not get too focused on just the surface but go deeper and broader.

So I asked Sally, “When you think about the launch what do you notice in your body?” Sally shot back quickly, “My body isn’t a resource. It’s a problem.”

She and I both noticed the amount of energy she had in that statement. Sally was curious about the belief and also about how that might actually be related to the launch success.

The big shift came during a ten-minute session. On a call she had scheduled, right when she was packing and heading out on an important trip. Being the responsible person she was, she had given some thought to canceling but did not want to inconvenience me.

About five minutes into the call, I asked, “Would it be better to cancel?”

“Well, I thought about that yesterday…and decided “No, I can not do that.”

I commented, “Instead of thinking about it – how about feeling about it right now.”

She laughed, “Of course, I did not do the breath, feel and check in with my body.” She did and decided to finish the session right then.

Later she shared how powerful that one shift had been. Not thinking, but breathing and using her body as a resource, was not only useful to make the best decision regarding our session, but as result, she was more regularly stopping the habitual – think it through – and instead started taking a breath and listening to her body.

It didn’t have to be a big deal and she was amazed at the quick and valuable input offered!!! She had more energy and vitality as a result!