Why I Work With Horses

IMG_0198I was listening to a webinar by the awesome Susan Hyatt, on getting people to say yes.

I suck at promoting myself.  Yes, I can promote The Haven, CrisMarie, Be BRAVE, thrive! – but when it comes to my work – well I just – don’t!  Okay may be that is a bit to universal.  I don’t think I do it well.

Here’s the deal.  I do enjoy working with people and introducing them to Mojo Coaching with the horses.  I have put it out a little online and with a local card rack offering.  I’ve had some great sessions, but I would not say I am gaining the traction I want.

So as I listened to Susan, I came to the conclusion that I have not yet really landed on my message and passion for doing this work.

I know I love it.

I know my heart opens when I am working with the horses.

But I am not yet communicating why you might really want to work with the horses!

So I decided to work on my message through just doing something else I love writing.

Why do I love Equus coaching and why might I be just the perfect person for you to come and give it a go?

What you need to know about me is that I have many layers of protection.  I have some great reasons for all that protection.  I have done 10,000 hours of working on my reactivity and learning how to clean up the messes I make, and I am still a work in progress.

However, when I started working with the horses, something new and profound happened.  I discovered just how quickly I could drop those protective walls and relax.  I can’t totally explain why, but when I step into an arena with a horse or horses.  I settle.

I don’t have to explain my face, my intensity, my reasons for being nervous or fidgety.  All I have to do is be me, fully and freely.  I get that a horse isn’t asking for anything more.IMG_0196

There’s an acceptance – as though that horse knows the inside of me not all the packaging or protecting I may attempt to do on the outside to keep myself safe.

I am invited to feel when I am scared, when I am angry, sad or upset.  The horses have the capacity to handle all of my energy as long as I am not pretending to be something I am not.

That acceptance has been profound for me.  Horses seem to genuinely want the company of someone who is fully themselves. They love it and they live it themselves.

I actually think that is one quality I share with horses. I can and love holding a space for people to bring all of themselves.  I don’t shy away from BIG feelings – be they happy glad, sad or mad.  I also haven’t yet heard a story I couldn’t hold when someone is sharing their truth.  But unlike a horse I am not without my flaws.  Sometimes my face isn’t easy to understand, or I do feel deeply and with intensity.  But like a horse, I relax when someone drops the walls and stands forward – scars and all.

I think that is what my Equus coaching practice offers.  A moment and a space where you really have a felt sense of being received and accepted for all of who you are. You really don’t have to do or be anything more.  Having that experience is life changing because being able to accept yourself and be yourself is what creates happiness and fulfillment. I don’t know about you, but I could always use more self-acceptance!




Living It! Bring Haven Home!

imageI love leading, teaching and learning in groups whether it’s a Haven program, or our Be BRAVE Women’s group, leading a team transformation offsite with a business team, or speaking to an entire organization. I love the live, face-to-face contact.

For a majority of my career, I have been a firm believer in face-to-face interactions as the best way to create transformational experiences and learning. However, times have changed and much of life these days takes place online and with people miles (may be even countries) apart. This is true in organizations, on teams, in families and even for couples. Life happens from a distance. Sure I love my face time and that is no longer required for developing trust, intimacy and transformation.

Having now participated in a number of online learning programs, I have developed friendships and connections that are as life enhancing has those that came from face-to face group experiences. As a member of a working team, I have found I can stay up-to-date and clear with colleagues moving significant projects forward and never or rarely getting together in person.

This week, CrisMarie have been delivering week four of our Be BRAVE class to a great group of women,  coaching sessions, webinars and radio programs, all from our home in Montana. That’s been great because not only have we gotten feedback that the work as been solid and powerful – we get to hang out at home with our dog, Rosie!

Why am I writing about this? Because in about six weeks, Haven’s Living It program is due to start with a weekend intensive on Gabriola. Living It! Is the first and only blended, meaning in person and online program,  Haven has offered.  It kicks off with the Haven magic of engaging in a circle on Gabriola with an awesome staff creating a great container for transformational learning and then continues for two months after online through webinars, groups and an online community site. Last year was our pioneer group. We were small but dedicated and worked our way through the challenges of technology and being the first!

Over the many years I have been at Haven, I have heard people speak of the challenges they face going home. Having had an intensive experience with deep connections and trying to figure out how to maintain that aliveness and engagement once back home in their ‘real’ world. I know it can be a challenge. In part it is why I am so committed to Living It! I know there are other paths at Haven like Staying Alive and Haven Coaching that can and do support the integration process. But I love the idea of meeting the challenge of integration while still in a program. In other words, taking Haven back home for a period of time and really having the support to try things, check in and try again!

So this blog is a really an ad! If you know that Haven has been an awesome transformational path for you and you have been challenged or want to bring more of that Haven magic back to your ‘real’ life, then consider signing up for Living It! It is powerfully helpful whether you have done just a Come Alive or the entire phase series.

Click here to learn more and sign up.

I do believe this is the next level of self-responsible relational living – being able to relate and create intimacy in person and online!

Join us! You’ll be amazed at how your life improves!