I have been reading a book called Busting Loose From the Money Game, by Robert Scheinfeld.  CrisMarie picked it up from Martha Beck’s book list.  She has been trying to get me to read along with her and I, of course, was resisting.  Let’s simply say that CrisMarie is committed to learning and growing.  She reads books recommended to her, gets regularly coached and is quite disciplined about trying things that people tell her will help her in places where she is stuck.  Sometimes I think she is trying a bit to hard to fix herself because frankly, I believe her life experience and success rate is way higher than she gives herself credit.  However, I love that she doesn’t ever stop experimenting or assume she’s ‘got it’.

At this point, she would be reminding me that this blog should be more about me and less about her.  So I’ll say that I like to learn, but I am not as willing to accept the lessons from just anyone.  I can be quite judgmental and resistant to new ways of doing things, especially if they seem ‘too simple’ or ‘easy.’  I have been hard-wired to believe life needs to be hard.  Which brings me back to Busting Loose from the Money Game, basically the message I am taking away is challenging that very belief.

Apparently, life does not really need to be that hard. I am simply, in my infinite wisdom, creating that game to play.  You may think that my tone is a bit sarcastic, however, not really.  I totally believe that life is a game.  I also believe that I am quite attracted to lots of drama and strong emotional interactions in my version of the game.  I compare it to biking.  Lot’s of people enjoy hills.  However, if I ask most people, if they prefer riding up the mountain or cruising down, they tell me cruising down.  Not me, I don’t like going that fast. No, I like grinding hard and getting to the top.  I like the challenge and thrive on that moment, when I get through thinking “this is impossible” and realize – “I did it.”   In a way, my bike riding is much like my game of life.  I often take the hard road and like to face challenges that seem ‘impossible.’

This book takes the premise that life is all an illusion that we are playing. That we are each creating our world and everything in as a way to play the Human Experience Game.  The book focuses on the Money Game because it is one that most of us get caught up in.  However, the process and storyline apply to life in general, not just money. Basically, the concept is simple. There are two phases to the Human Experience Game.  Phase I is the total immersion into the illusion of limitation. This starts at birth and we really work to convince ourselves on all levels that the physical experience we are having is real and that we are separate beings. In other words, we give up completely our spiritual, non-physical oneness and connection to Source or all that is possible.

At some point, once fully in, we have a chance to shift to Phase II. Phase II is busting loose from all of the illusions and fully realizing that we are creating, through our expanded consciousness, everything about our physical experience.  Now, that is quite a storyline.  Yet, it is one that is told in so many different way, through so many different people and experiences, that I think this version Busting Loose from The Money Game  is finally the one that is cracking my resistant thinking. I think I have known for a long time that life is an illusion.  My reality has been shaken, stirred and stripped away enough times that I totally get that there is no ONE reality.  I don’t think though that I have been fully able to own my own power and connection to the Divine in creating my experience.

Maybe I could own a connection. When I am with others and there is an opening, I have a felt sense of the divine and the infinite power and possibility, I get we can create anything – it is all possible.  However, I still have lots of beliefs that stop me from fully owning that with or without the group, the others (all of which I have been creating for me to see); I AM the Source. The physical way I pull from my expanded consciousness is my reality game – it is all my own doing. I create the pain, the joy, the heart ache and every space in between.

It isn’t good or bad, right or wrong, it is simply the game I am playing.  It’s easy to think, “Oh now that I know that – I’ll create a ‘better’ game.”  However, that is still playing the judgment game – so not really in the busting loose category.   I have some slight glimpses of a totally different possibility.   The possibility of being in the joy of whatever I am creating, owning and taking responsibility for that creation and feeling everything fully as play my game. I am not quite there yet.

I get it when I watch NCAA basketball – March madness.  Every year it seems there are the predicted winning teams.  Those teams are not my teams. However, every year there is a surprise team.  This year it’s The Florida Gulf Coast University (FGCU) team.  Watching them play is like watching pure joy.  They are having fun.  I have no idea if they will go all the way to win the NCAA.  In the past, part of my Game was the underdog needed to win to prove it was possible.  Oddly, this year, I don’t think that matters, they are totally living in the moment and that is the to the essence of the Human Experience Game.  That is the prize – over and over – whether it looks like winning or whether it looks like losing. Being fully in it!! Go FGCU!!!