What does it mean? I know many are sad, dishearten, and see this as an ending. I don’t actually know.
The Haven is For Sale
What came up strongly for me, when I saw the reality of The Haven being on the market, was a desire to make the experiences I do have at Haven as meaningful as possible.
With that in mind, I am calling ALL COUPLES who’ve benefited from the rich, enlivening Couples Alive, (and/or any relationship program at the Haven) to come back this summer to have what might be a last blast!
My dream for this August Couples Alive is a room filled with couples who love and have benefited in their relationship from all their time at The Haven. We once thought that was going to be the 4th segment of the Couples Alive Series. It didn’t happen.
So why not create that experience now? This summer. Maybe the last summer of Haven.
Our August Couples Alive brings together two things I just love about Haven.
The opportunity to engage in revitalizing my relationship
Being on beautiful Gabriola Island in the summer!
CrisMarie and I both plan to bring all our deep loving and joy to this program. It may be a last one we lead at The Haven. We want to make it extra special.
I am calling out to all you people who want to join us in for a special summer run of Couples Alive. I know every time CrisMarie and I have taken, or lead, one of these programs it has a transformational impact both my ME and in our WE.
Maybe you are in a relationship that has become flat or transactional.
Maybe you want to relive the resonance that the Haven property brings forth in you and your honey.
Maybe you want to apply the Couples Alive tools to revitalize where you two are now.
Maybe you want to just come out and hang with us and others who deeply value intimacy and relating.
Maybe you want to say goodbye to the Haven property.
Join us for possibly the last Haven property Couples Alive August 18-22! There’s still time to sign up, but don’t wait too long…Sign up NOW!
What a wonderful weekend!! The Haven is celebrating it’s 30th Birthday, sort of all year, but this past weekend was the signature event. It was a celebration of the past, the present and the future of The Haven. Those that put the weekend together, Rachel, Louise, Morag and all of the Haven Staff, did an amazing job. This is their busiest time of year, Kids in The Spotlight ( a truly awesome experience for children – nothing else like it) a sellout each year for five weeks, finished it’s 2013 run on Friday morning. Plus, a wedding party on the island was taking all of the available rooms arriving Sunday afternoon. Not to mention, the start of Teens Alive and Come Alive on Monday. So even making this happen was a challenge. But not only did it happen, the weekend was a delightful experience and gathering of the old (folks who had 30 plus years of Ben and Jock programs and experience) and the newer, those who have become Haven folks under the Haven Foundation. It was wonderful.
For me, it truly was like seeing the many, many layers of my own transformation and the people I can only call my ‘human heroes’ – those that have embodied and invited me to discover the life possible through open, honest relating. Not always pretty and polite, but real, raw, authentic and alive!
It was so fun to participate in a ‘worldwide’ streamed visualization led by Ernie and Cathy McNally, and I giggled as various memories surfaced from my own 28 year Haven epic! Next, was an amazing artistic adventure and co-creative process designed and facilitated by the wonderful Marlyn Farrell. I was resistant to go and came away loving the experience. There were so many magical moments and this post could just be a blow-by-blow of the weekend. But really that isn’t my main point. Still I am reminded of just how special The Haven is and my wish that more people knew of the place and the people that have made it possible for so many to transform themselves, their relationships and the world around them!
The magic of being together for a Haven Sunset!
Of course, that magic does exist elsewhere, I don’t mean to imply that only at The Haven can one be transformed. No, but it is a very special place. Possibly because there are so many different types of leaders and people who come. It is a a place for the odd duck and the average Joe. It welcomes the righteous and invites each of us who come with our own set of assumptions to consider being a bit more curious. There are often strong opinions and people on missions. Yet there is this space that opens and allows for the most defended and the most vulnerable to sit together in a circle and simply be, breath, feel and converse. If that doesn’t help, well there’s dancing and music and great food. Not everyone walks away happy and blissful. No, that is not the purpose. The Haven is a space for all to come, to be, to speak, to join and to discover. Without answers or a right or wrong, just people being together. It is amazing what that alone creates!!
That is what was being celebrated this weekend. The space, the literal space and the metaphoric space that allows for transformation. Indeed, over my 28 years here, I have rediscovered myself so many times. I have connected and seen worlds and universes well beyond my limited physical possibility, and I am deeply grateful!!
Sunday morning we journeyed into a possible future for The Haven. The story boards and designs were collaborative process of dreaming BIG and looking at the reality of a property on an island with limits and by-laws. Again creating that tension that comes and builds when there is an opening, a curiosity, and a dialogue, allowing for a leap of innovation to take place. Yes, The Haven is now shaping itself, utilizing all of it’s magic. People coming together to dream, to wrestle with reality, to wrestle with assumptions and use that juice to move ahead. No decisions were made. But I saw the possibility and the folks that were going to be furthering the plans, and again I was amazed. I have no doubt magic is in the making. The Haven Institute isn’t a static, still point. It is growing and transforming, just as I am. I may or may not like all the directions The Haven moves, but I love, that much like me, the property, the place is living and breathing and carrying on!! Happy Birthday Haven!!
Susan Clarke is a long standing faculty member at The Haven Institute. She leads The Living Alive Phase I, with CrisMarie Campbell, October 16-November 10, 2013 and Couples Alive I – Foundation, Communication and Boundaries, Oct. 7-10, 2013. Susan Clarke and CrisMarie Campbell are also founders of thrive! inc., a coaching and consulting firm helping teams, individuals and couples make the leap to better results in their relationships, work and lives.
My word for the year is a phrase, “Leap of Faith”. I was going to simply stick with the plan, one word for the year. At first I thought Leap – however, that did not quite fit. Faith wasn’t quite right either. Then I saw this picture that I bought earlier in 2012 while taking Sooke to the vet. I love it. There’s the elder duck leading the way out of the nest up in a tree and then the little ones, look out and then finally, leap. Their wings seem so small and incapable of flight. Yet, there they go!
It’s time to fly!!
Sometimes I feel like those little ducks. Yet, I am much closer, may be even older than the mother duck pushing the babes out of the nest. If I reflect on my life as it is now, I do see both, and in many ways both are taking a Leap of Faith. Sure, the more physical evidence of the leap is seen in the baby ducks. However, that mom, likely has some inner angst about what is about to happen and must have tremendous faith to step out of the way. I relate to both.
This year we plan to re-launch Thrive!. This in many ways will be a Leap of Faith. We intend to bring our whole selves to this new business. This means we no longer want to have our lives compartmentalized. In the past, we had our corporate presence and we had our various more personal pursuits. The revitalized Thrive! will be designed to integrate both. We plan to maintain our work with leaders, teams and organizations, and we also will include our strong belief that business is personal. That the corporate world would greatly benefit from embracing a whole person/whole team approach. In many ways this concept is really mother bird speaking. We know this concept is a mature and vital path that works. We have been embracing it ourselves for years and have built a powerful partnership that continues to ignite and sustain our health, wealth and relationship.
The baby duck part of the leap is simply being willing to step out fully as who we each are and who we are together. Last year we started leading the Couples Alive Series couples programs up at The Haven. The Haven Institute has always been like a safe nest where I can learn and develop. So it was easy to step into leading together. We didn’t question out value or wonder about being accepted. We simply brought all we have learned through being together for over twelve years and assumed if we were open, real and curious we had lots to offer any couple – same sex or not.
Now we want to be more transparent in who we are out in the bigger world, to take the leap of faith and trust that we can fly. Sure, may be not everyone will like discovering we are not simply a business partnership. However, I believe until now our biggest doubters have been ourselves.
Aside from the work transition and re-launching, I am also leaping into the world of writing. I have been writing for years. It has been my path for integrating and revealing to myself my inner world. More recently I have stepped further out. Through my blog and writing for 406 Magazine. Yet I don’t think of myself as a writer. I don’t fully commit to that path. This year I am making the leap. I have signed up for a kick-off workshop with writers I know will challenge and encourage me to go deeper and broader.
So my phrase, Leap of Faith, fits for me. I am both mature and quite young at what I am jumping into. I have a solid foundation that I can count on and I am ready for new ground and possibilities.
Though what intrigues me most is the space between the young ducks just launching themselves out of the tree and the older duck giving the push. That space is where faith becomes something beyond leaping into the vast unknown or holding faith in that which is known for someone to step into. The space is yet another aspect to leap of faith. I believe it is that middle ground. I must leap. My wings are not young and new – my wings are scarred and older. I have known the pain of crashing into the ground and failing to fly. Yet I must still step from the tree and take the leap. Knowing I have the heart and courage of being both young and old.
So I am thrilled to take the a leap of faith into 2013.
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