It is a time of year where I generally have amble material to write about. The holidays stir up so many differences and traditions, family and relationship issues that I am rarely at a loss for a good rich topic to explore. Maybe it’s this cold I have or maybe it’s Bailey; but this year I am just not rising to any thoughtful dialogue. It’s true I have not read about fights of saying Merry Christmas vs Happy Holiday, or stories of airports having to take down Christmas trees because of religious unfairness so either the world is re-focused on more important issues or I have become a bit insulated here in Montana.
The biggest challenge I am facing this Christmas is a serious, unrelenting cold and a puppy that needs constant supervision. Truthfully Bailey is learning faster then this cold is letting go.
The cold came on over a week ago now. Every time I think I have turned the corner and I go to do some relatively simple activity like bringing in wood or walk in the woods, suddenly I am back to square one. The hardest part is at night, I can not stop the coughing. Plus my mind kicks in and I start to wonder if this is H1N1 and if I should go to the doctor etc., etc.
I have not had a bad cold in a very long time and I think that is part of the problem. I am really no good at curling up in bed and resting, drinking fluids and otherwise doing nothing. I told myself if the cold was back today that is what I was going to make myself do. Bailey was going to Stolte’s for a play day and I was going to stay in bed and do nothing.
I do wonder why a day of complete rest so so hard. I have never liked having to stay in bed. I wouldn’t say I am an A-type personality. Because a lot of my activity is not results oriented. It is simply that I don’t like being sick, down, or may be the real word is helpless. I do hate feeling helpless and being sick is just too close that feeling word for me! Even when I was really sick (cancer, chem – sick) , I would force myself to put on my running gear and step out of my door as though I was going to run. I never ran (likely walked a block or two) but somehow I felt less helpless and in control if I could at least make the effort. Even then being in bed all day was not easy.
Well it’s 6Am I woke myself up coughing and I went out to chop some wood and felt lousy. Found enough already cut to come back in quickly. All indicators point to me taking the day off. I’m try to tell myself it’s okay to do nothing, especially if that is what will get rid of this cold!
I want to be healthy by Christmas. I think a day of bed rest would help. That means not even going out for lunch at the Green Tea House or deciding to run and pick up some needed supplies. No my mission should I choose to take it is complete bed rest. Movies, books and maybe a better blog then this will come out of it. But most importantly allowing my body to totally focus on kicking this cold!! Wish me luck!!